Why grass?!!

I hate the grass. It grows too fast, requires constant mowing, I constantly get fined for having it too long even after constant mowing, AND it's even less killable than the weeds!



I'd grow delicious veggies and herbs but the insects infesting my ground make it impossible. My corn came out smaller than raisins. Like that episode of Giligan's Island when the "raisin" turned out to be a watermelon.


Wheat grass would at least be nutritious. I wonder if it grows as well as typical grass.Also, it doesn't seem to require fertilizer. I tried to make my own compost (why pay when you can make it free?) but the aformentioned insects are impossible.

This season, I'll try lawn fabric to cover the whole mess. Hopefully, it'll last half as long as stated but I'm sure my lawn will win out soon enough.

Oh, well, there's always rock gardens. No, wait, the neighborhood kids will throw them through my windows. Maybe I could just plop a shed on top?

How ridiculous is the time and money spent caring for a lawn? Grass seed, fertilizer, insecticide, weed killer, lawn mower, trimmer, maintenance, water... And of course there's the people who water their lawns during the worst droughts. Can't let the grass go thirsty while people can go ahead and die of dehydration, right?

Even better, how about a desert theme? Plant those cacti that retain water forever. Then during a
drought you could drink from the lawn! 

Plant food for the homeless and hungry if not for yourself.

Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends (aka Love Triangle)

Talk about flexibility: Spidey can change in the tight confines of a sarcophagus! Where's Spidey stashing his clothes?

Iceman - Anyone else thinks he might be overemphasizing his muscles when he builds that icy shell? And where did his clothes go that time he turned back to Bobby wearing nothing but underwear?

The secret room - How'd they build it and with what money? Why hasn't Aunt May accidentally activated it when dusting or walked in while it was open and they were out?


Three's Company - The threesome are like Three's Company with superpowers. Well, I guess since Firestar looks like MJ they didn't need Mary Jane Watson there even if Anna Watson was living next door. Love triangle!

 
Licensing fees, please - They have Spidey comics, T-shirts, and costumes. They invited him to star in a Hollywood movie. Why isn't Peter getting a cut of this stuff? Since they like to send Spidey bills for destruction in the wake of his superheroing, at least he could start a fund using licensing fees to pay for all that. Peter's so broke he had to go as Spider-Man for Halloween while his equally jobless college friends got to go as other superheroes.

That arcade - Who studies in an arcade? Can anyone even concentrate with all the noise? Not that I didn't enjoy seeing Flash Thompson getting Ponged to within an inch of his life.

That Dracula -  Anyone else think Dracula sounded fruity saying "frisky little frosty friend?" How did he keep crocodiles alive in a tiny enclosed space for decades? Vampires should be afraid of fire so why marry Firestar?



Miscellaneous - How did the Red Skull's henchmen touch that burning rope around Iceman with their bare hands? How did they save the future from Spidey germs without decomtaminating the future girl before sending her back?